A Woman's Response

I didn't see much of the super bowl (I even missed The Who! Boo!) but I did see this stupid Dodge commercial. The point of the commercial is that grown men need to be rewarded for being....grownups. Its freaking ridiculous. Wow, you should really get a medal for being civil to my mother. Lord have mercy did this commercial annoy the crap out of me.

Today I was pleased to see a woman's response to the ad. It's brilliant.

I'll Never Eat Octopus Again

Wow. This octopus uses a coconut shell as a tool, he carries it around and uses it to hide. I had no idea octopuses (how do you pluralize that, octopi?) were so smart! I feel so bad now that I've eaten them. I'm impressed.

My New Religion

Oh. My. God. You guys, I love Cracker Barrel. It's my favorite place to go in Georgia (other than my mama's house!) for food when I'm home visiting Augusta. The "vegetable plate," a delicious choice that makes you feel good for ordering it but in reality is not even remotely healthy, is my favorite. On my typical "vegetable plate" I get macaroni and cheese, hash brown casserole, green beans--one of the only actual vegetables on the list, but cooked with like, lard and bacon, and maybe fried okra or fried apples. Yes, the remainder of vegetable options are fried. This is PRECISELY why I love the Cracker Barrel. That and the biscuits and sweet tea.

But dude, this guy took it to another level. I have never even considered getting a Cracker Barrel tattoo. Does this mean I'm not a real fan? I DID write to corporate and ask them to open a branch in Southern California, I DID inquire as to why they've never come further west than Arizona, but I DID NOT tattoo mashed potatoes, collard greens, and...is that ham or baked beans, I'm not sure...on my belly. Or wait, it is meatloaf?

The best part is the rocking chair in like a halo of light at the top. Its like the equivalent of Jesus or something. How wrong is it that I'm now jonesin' for some fried okra and biscuits?

Merry Christmas!!!

A very special Merry Christmas from a Japanese beatboxer. Yeah, I didn't know what that was either, but it's pretty cool--he does at least three Christmas songs--and he looks really funny in his santa hat.

Thursday Here I Come!

I'm consumed with Thanksgiving already. This half week of work is a veritable hell. The evaporated milk and cake flour is already sitting on my counter, boss. I'm thinking of meyer lemon cake, and cranberry sauce, and whether my new pumpkin pie recipe will work without following Martha Stewart's fifteen step recipe for a perfect pie crust. I am not thinking of drafting a case management statement or discovery. Judging by my silent phone, no one else is thinking of work either.

I'm already planning how many times I have to work out (answer: every day) in order to eat my fill on Thanksgiving. Thinking about what time I'll start my pie on Thursday morning (answer: shoot for the butt crack of dawn and actually deliver late morning). Willing my bread cubes to go stale for a tasty, sourdough stuffing.

I'm even already freaking out about Christmas gifts.

And don't get me started on Christmas cookies.............

I think I've become my mama.

Women in Combat

It's a little bit ironic that when a crazy shooting rampage happened on a U.S. military base the one person that was able to take down the assailant was a civilian female cop. She was actually a former soldier in the Army.

Poor little defenseless women. Yes military, now I see why you forbid women from fighting for their country. Crazy men, sure. Women, not so much.

Captain Tightpants Rides Again

For those Firefly lovers out there, Captain Mal got back into his tightpants (for those of you not in the know, and whoever you are, go watch Firefly NOW, Captain Mal's nickname around the internet is "Captain Tightpants") last night on whatever new show he's on. (Its called Castle but I must confess I've never seen it).

I love the reference to the fact that he wore that costume 5 years ago--you know, when the asshats as Fox canceled the show.

I hear the episode was full of Firefly references. Am I going to be required to watch a cop procedural show just to get my tightpants fix?